Desmond and the Soccer Route.

Here's a little tidbibt: To reach my house, I have to walk past a basketball court, where kids/students/grown adults play soccer. We don't have no soccer court you see.

Anyways, I hate walking down that path beside the court, cos there's no fencing on that side of the court. And it's sorta a neighbourhood thing, that if a soccer ball flies out of the court, and onto the path, the guy on the path will get the ball for the players.

It's unspoken, and everyone abides by it... mainly becos, the entire court, and their spectator buddies will first look at the ball, then at you. Which is really no pressure at all for you to get the ball.

Here's the thing. If you know me, I have no ball sense whatsoever. There's a reason why people fall off laughing when i say I watched a soccer match, or played soccer.

Hold on to your seats as go on.

Now, the last time i played soccer was last year. (yes, yes, if you haven't fallen off, you may let go of your seats. If you have fallen, well... get up.)

The last time I played, I happened to do what is known as a Slide.

Anyways, a few things were happening in that split second.
a.) me being stunned, knowing that I have done something that was stun-worthy.
b.) my friends being stunned. knowing that I have made a slide, that was stun-worthy .
c.) and that slide being the first by anyone in 3 games.

And amidst all the confusion, I heard my friend say, "I'm sure he didn't mean to do that."

He was right.

I merely tripped over myself, and happened to fall so nicely it looked like i was sliding, and it happened that the ball was where I was sliding towards.

So then, knowing that this kinda things happen rarely, I don't expect to be sliding the next (hundred) soccer balls that come flying out of the court and towards me when I walk home in the near future.

That's why I rush by that route.

Haha, such a long story just to say that.
Haha whatever.

Desmond and The It.

I hate clowns. Seriously, I think clowns are freaky... and I'm sure at least one person out there agrees with me.

Recently I started thinking about this show that my sister thinks, started my fear of clowns. (Btw that's called Coulrophobia.)

I never get why this X-phobia names have nothing to do with X. Like coulrophobia. You would think it means fear of couldrons. WOH KAY. Sidetrack.

Anyways, this show was The It. I thought about my memories of it, and compared it to what I read on wiki. Turns out what they say about, making your memories by adding and removing things each time you replay it in your mind, is true.

Ok here's my version:
The It is a clown that these children fight off in a cave. Somehow, there's a giant spider in it all also.

Real version:
The It is a clown that these adults (who supposedly killed it, when they were children) fight off in the sewers. Somehow, it's true form is a spider.

ANYWAYS, yea. Freaked me out. My sis says I was so afraid (and still am) of them that when she brought me to see a clown when i was a kid, I screamed upon seeing them, and ran off. Needless to say, her phobia is screaming siblings who run away when they're under her care.

Just how much do I hate clowns? Well you know those Ronald McDonald benches? Well, I'll pass. He still freaks me out. I hate Mcdonald birthday parties.

Still, the couldron-phobia thingy aside, I would love to catch the show with my sis again. Haha, yea, i'm kinda psycho like that.

Hmm... Psycho huh. Now isn't that the name of that film................

Desmond and Chinese New Year 07'

Chinese New Year is here again.

Here's what comes along with it:
1. Sickening wang wang advertisements, that repeat themselves like a migraine that refuses to leave. (haha, but i haven't seen much this year at all, maybe cos i'm watching more cable, and less local stations. Smart move desmond. HAHA.)

2. Pineapple tarts. Yay!

3. F&N Orange. The only other time you drink Orange is well, at a chinese wedding dinner, where you raise the glass of orange admist the stout and beer, in toasts of "yam seng".

4. Relatives who say you've grown to be such a BIG boy, becos last year, you were only 7mm tall.

5. Pineapple tarts (The Restock), cos you ate so many your mom had to bake/buy them again.

6. Holiday specials on TV, which you dun watch cos, well... you've got cable now. Haha..

And of cos, red packets. Haha, oh boy. chinesenewyear. chine sen ewy ear. chi nes enew ye ar.

Desmond and the Ambitions.

I was wondering, how do people decide what they want to be in the future?

I was watching the discovery channel, something on archaelogy... (I dun rmb a SINGLE thing about the show)... the only thing i was thinking about was, why in the world would this lady want to work under the hot sun, digging up bones.

So what exactly aids in a person's choice of ambition? Cos they look up to someone, say a fireman, so they wanna be a fireman?

Cos they really like doing something, say eating so they become a chef?

Cos they really like a place, say the sandbox, so they become an archaelogist?

For me... ask me when i started wanting to be what I want to be, and this image pops up in my mind. It's at my front door, but inside the house. It's a feeling.

Maybe that's it then -- the feeling you get when you do something, or are someplace, or with someone, and you like that feeling, and you want to recreate that feeling... is it?

Haha, I dunno.
I know this is a really stupid question, but I wonder if ambitions change, even if its one that last for years.

Oh well... -exhales-.

Hey, God, thanks for today. :)

Desmond and the Night.

Though I walk through valleys low

I'll fear no evil

By the waters still my soul

My heart will trust in You

My heart will trust in You

-hillsongs, my heart will trust.

You are so good Father. :) Thank You.

Desmond and the Blank.

Give me oil in my lamp,
Keep me burning.
Give me oil in my lamp,
I pray.

Give me oil in my lamp,
Keep me burning,
Burning burning.

Keep me burning,
To the end of day.
---
There's so much that's going through my mind these days.

Sometimes, i just don't know what to say, you know?














I've typed and backspaced so many times, I give up.
ECJJJG - I'm sorry.
---
God, You know best don't You? Thank You.
"Even when (I) was faithless You are faithful."

Desmond and the Apprentice.

I hate The Apprentice.

I do. I really do. I don't like the show at all. It's so cut throat.
I just had the channel on my TV, the firing part? My word.

Seriously, being in school is the best. Honest. Homework aside, it really is a good place. Take it from me.

Altho it must be noted that I mean, being in school as a student. Not as staff. Cos that's just work too.

I hate conflict.
I do. I really do.
I run away from it.
Church's a good place.

:) thankyew God.

Desmond and the Good Neighbour.

My sis, bro and me came back home today, after dinner with our parents... And found out that we didn't have any house keys! So my brother has to pee, my sis is gonna go out, and I... well... mainly i'm just so bloated.

And we're thinking oh no.. our parents are not gonna come back that quick, and we can't be sitting outside for the next one and half hour or so. So we decided to check if my neighbour has our keys...

But auntie isn't home, and uncle can't hear us, and well... just when things are about to get desperate, my brother calls out from the corridor bend, "aunty jidi aunty jidi!!"

( Now, for the sake of Jidi, you will read 'Aunty' as SISTER. )

Haha, yes. Thank God she came back, and found the keys.

Initially she thought something had happened to her father, since my brother was so excited when he saw her, and its us 3 kids standing outside in the corridor.

A boy couldn't ask for a better neighbour, and God. :)
--

Today there was something so different when I thought about God's love for me. It's a familiar feeling, that I usually tag to something else.

(For myself to rmb what..." Desmond, the familiar feeling was how you always feel when you think about supn. and lant. and tem.") Haha, i wonder if even i will understand next time!

But i thank You God. Because... You know la. Haha, No one. no one could ever replace You and the love You bring.

You make me very happy.

Desmond and Supernatural.

Argh! New favourite show man!!

I've read about it a long while now, since it first came out, and when I still had the time to snoop around the now defunct WB website.

SUPERNATURAL!!

Now usually with me, its,"Horror? No thank you.."

But its different with Supernatural... maybe cos its not that scary. (EVEN THO its still 3 mins of the show mainly behind the cushion.) And its just 43 - 3 min per week as opposed to 2 hours when there's no commercial break. It's not just mindless scare and shock tactics, cos its got the drama element in it.

And it's a known fact I love Drama.

I have a sorta list of shows I always wanted to follow but have never.

1.) Lost (only through readings online.)

2.) Alias (i have no idea what's going on.)

3.) 24 (cos ppl keep talking about it.)

4.) 4400. (that's a real show!! and i read about it online too. haha)

5.) Supernatural (hey!! I could be following it now.. :):):)

6.) CSI (argh.. way too long mann. since the last ep. and its on axn now.)

Ok, so maybe that's why I like Supernatural. Its drama, its something i can follow, after a really long time of aimless channel-hopping.

AHhh. TV.

HAHA

Desmond and the Last of 06', in 07'.

How surreal. I didn't even see it coming, at least i didn't think it would be that quick. But there it went. 31st December 2006. Just went by, with my dirty hands, and standing at the back of Sembawang, with the rest. Wishing each other new year wishes in whispers.

It felt nice.

I dun feel any older, any different. It is only the knowledge a new beginning has come that sets me thinking, "there must be something more (in the new year)(because it IS a new year)."

I guess that's hope then. Although mine seems to be more, Hope By Default. But I think it is realising and coming to terms with your present, and being down to earth about it. But also knowing that your present, is well... simply that. That 'present' must give way to 'future'.

And for us, we not only hope, but we rest, assured, in the knowledge that a Future is coming, and that our own futures are held in His Hand.

--

On a lighter note, I went for the Movie Marathon, and it was packed. Screaming, shouting, laughing. Strangely throughout the entire night. It seems like pp took turns to sleep, and then to stay awake.

But the whole feeling behind the event was mostly, nice and warm. Like being in your house with all the free-walking about, and having to deal with siblings who kept screaming, and the like. But the fellowship was nice.

It felt nice. :)

Instead of having to deal with the dog-eat-dog-ness in the office.

I love the Saints. :)

HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone!

Oh and Joy won an Ipod. Just had to etch that down in the desmond chronicles. So exciting!! Our region pp have won at the last 2 watchnights now! haha..

Desmond and the Double.

I KNEW IT!

Haha, i dunno if i've ever said this on the blog, but chandler is the one TV character i feel i'm really like. In the stupid things we like, the situations we have been in. Of cos, my family is not as messed up as his is, but my point is... so many similarities!! The good and the bad la huh. haha..

Sometimes when I watch Friends, Chandler would do something and i would think to myself, "HEY! that's how i would react too!!"

Of cos, i'm realistic also la huh. Haha, he is he, i am i, its impossible to be replicas. haha..

Ahh, its been a long time....
Up up and away pp!

----
Arh i did write about it before!! In Desmond and Friends (The TV Show)

Desmond and the (near) End of Year Post.

Give us peace when we're torn
Mend us up when we break
This flesh can be wounded and shaking
When there's much too much trouble for one heart to take
Give us peace when we're torn

Give us hearts to find hope
Father, we cannot see
How the sorrow we feel can bring freedom
And as hard as we try, Lord, it's hard to believe
So, give us hearts to find hope

-Faith to be Strong, Andrew Peterson.

---

This year has come and gone by so very fast. Just like that, its been almost more than 9 months in the army. As a little trivia for you, this would be the first time in these 9 months that I've actually wrote the word 'ARMY' in my blog. (as far as I can rmb.)

As much as it was short, its been really long, if you understand what i mean. Time passes by so fast, but the journey has been really long and tiring. Don't get me wrong, God has blessed me so much, and shown me so much mercy and grace.

I have a very good job, and most things in my life are going smoothly.

Sounds like I'm gonna have a 'but'... but no 'but'. Haha, it is as it is. God has been good.

In 04' I learnt "that faith is trust in the character of God to do what He knows is best" and that "God doesn't change." This year, the understanding that God loves and accepts me unconditionally has really hit home. Or is still hitting home.

Well, till the 31st, where 06's closing entry will come. Let me think what to write. haha..
Till then, Happy birthday Jesus.. erm. I usually ask You to bless my friends when its their birthdays.. maybe we should bless You now. haha, Blessed Christmas everyone.

Up, up and away!

Desmond and the Theatre Poem.

in the
cold
theatre
damp
curtains
hard
flooring
full
audience

the one-man show
goes on
unnoticed

casted director
directing actor

cd/da: heh

The curtains fall.

Desmond and the Grin that Stole the Sanity.

Sometimes, out of nowhere, something will cause me to grin uncontrollably to myself. Those times, I feel the muscles at the either ends of my mouth tighten up, and there I'd go, grinning like my life depended on it.

It can be over everything and anything really; alot of snacks left over in the office; lots of milk in the fridge; nice show on tv. Times like these, the monologue to myself begins. "Desmond, stop smiling like that. If someone catches you, you won't be able to explain yourself. You'll betray your neurosis, and we know your inwardly-neurosis keeps you outwardly-sane."

Of cos the grinning is part of the inward crazy that's spilling over, eating away at the normal, even mundane, exterior. Like termites eating your precious wood pieces, or like me at the chinese new year-table, wiping the table clean of pineapple tarts.

Still, here are some things you could do, when you get high and start to laugh at everything and anything.
1.) Take out your handphone, and pretend to be talking on the phone.
2.) Put your fist in your mouth, so you'll stop laughing.
3.) Just laugh out loud.

The bible says, "A merry heart, doeth good like a medicine." :)

Desmond and the Window-shopping Story.

Sis evelyn once told us of how, when she first came to church, she didn't know anyone, and she would come to church, listen to the sermon, and leave, without (really) talking to anyone... cos she just didn't know anyone.

And she came week after week, without talking to anyone. Until one day, on her way to sunday service, she detoured and went to a shopping centre and just window-shopped that sunday.

I can't really rmb what the moral of her story was, but what i did rmb was the gist. That as much as we should be in church for God, and to worship God... having friends in church is also important. Cos God did not make us to be alone.

How true that no man is an island.
Fellowship of the Saints? Yep. We all need someone to hold us up, to encourage us, to listen to us complain (once in awhile.....)

.. to be sensitive to us, so that we dun need to say anything...

Of cos we'll have to be that Someone, to someone else.
It's a two-way street. And it takes effort..

Effort to 1.) Be there for others.
2.) Be there, for others to be there for you.

"By this shall they know that you are My disciples, that you love one another."

Desmond and the public games.

Do you ever play stupid games with strangers, without them knowing they are part of the game? Haha, I do sometimes.

Its nothing much la, haha, but sometimes when i walk home, i play racing games with the people ard me. Cos sometimes they'll rush and rush, and i want to show them there's no need to be so hectic.. So i'll try to walk as cool-ly as possible, but overtake them. Then I'll slow down and let them overtake me, before I repeat the process again with them.

Another game i used to play; when i am in a bus, and the bus is leaving the bus-stop, i maintain eye contact with a person at the bus-stop and see who breaks the contact the first. Haha, usually i lose. HAHA..

Sometimes i play a rushing game with myself, like try to get home before 7, cos i have never done that before.. on a normal working day. Haha, so i'll rush like mad, trying my best to reach home without running.. for too long. haha, the closest i got was 7.00.01 ONE SECOND!

I'm so tired.. haha, i want to sleep. I can't be in church tmr cos i have weekend duties. Its a busy month, but i pray i will be able to go church still.. So far next week is the only confirmed can go week. Oh, i'm taking leave from wed to fri this coming week.. so... yea. rest before the storm. Haha..

God bless us. Haha, night reader..

Desmond and What Matters.

I am convinced that what matters to you, matters to God.

I've been wanting, awhile now, to write an entry about how God is a vandal... in a sense (don't get me wrong.) I see His handiwork scribbled all over my life. In little things like giving me favor in the office, while doing my weekend duties, so many many things... big and small.

I'm sure you've experienced it too. Everywhere you go, the Name pops up.

"God was here. 241006." on the walls at home.
"God was here. 171006." on the way home.
"God was here. 201006." on the office table.

Of cos i read something a few days ago, that put what I meant, in a way that's more appopriate. It went "God's autograph", as opposed to my "God's vandalism."

Haha, nonetheless, I am convinced that what matters to you, matters to God.

I really dunno how else to say this. I guess it means, God makes your problems, your cares, your anxieties... His business. He knows what makes you happy and excited, and He takes note of that. The things and people that are important to you, I think they are important to God too.

So take heart, if you're walking thru hard and difficult times, know that God is aware of it, and your situation is His business. :)
For the lonely, the worn out, the stressed out, the misunderstood, insert-your-own-situation.... rest in the fact that what matters to you, matters to God.

---

Father God, s igh.i
d unn oho w.i
' ma tth een do fm y______.
Bu tthan kyo u.

Desmond and the Need.

I need You
No one but You
None besides You
Only You

- E.F, _______

Heh, dun even know the title to the song.

Desmond and the Flash Shortage.

I have no flash. Can't download it, can't set it up.

For a few mths now.

SO IRRITATING. haha i can't acess so many things! Like youtube, or whatever tube things that has videos that use a flash. Or col's tag board. Which I have to ask, why does your tagboard need flash arh col? haha.. and i realised today. That i can't acess the WB site too, cos it uses flash! At least parts of it. I think.

Turn on the flash please. haha

Ok, i'm in a very ______ mood. So its gonna get long, so readers please stop reading here.

I miss you guys. I dunno where you are now. You're probably right there. But its seems abit far. Just round the corner. Or maybe just right beside me. Yet you seem untangible. Like a senseless grasping of the morning mist. I'm sorry.

you can't begin to imagine how much i miss you. sometimes i think i might have an easier time with you around. at least i knew you believed in me, back then. maybe i'd fit in better. i have so much to say to you. but you know how sometimes too much makes it difficult to say anything at all. --

You told me He said, "unconventional." I cried so hard then cos i knew but i never wanted that. its so difficult. i miss you too.

Father, you know i love them. will You keep them safe? bring that person back to you, and just watch over the rest. give them so much grace Father. amen.

Desmond and the Filler.

Sometimes, there are just no words.

Sometimes, a tinge of sadness creeps up, unknowingly. Burrowing itself in your heart. And Sarah McLachlan's Fallen doesn't help to chase it away.

Sometimes the words bubble around the rims, but no push suffices in spilling the contents.

In times like these, you make up ostentatious words and sentences. As filler for a page that deserves an update.

But what ostentatious word can be filler for that little void in one's heart?

Sometimes, especially recently, I feel I'm running on Over-due Grace.

Its yesterday's grace. Its not a new thing. Its a left-over from yesterday, yesterweek. When I still remembered to fall at His feet and to spend time with Him. When I was in His presence, and He gave me strength.

And these days, these weeks, I've allowed myself to slacken. I forsake time in His presence, and the over-due grace is slowing flowing out, and nothing new flows in. And questions start to snatch at the opportunity to be that filler.

But only One can fill the emptiness.

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases,
His mercies never come to an end.
They are new every morning,
Great is Thy faithfulness.

His Love -- unceasing despite my unfaithfulness.
Thankyou Father.