Desmond and That Banner of Love.

:)

You are beautiful, wonderful,
beyond the reaches of my mind.

You are great and awesome
beyond the depths of my understanding.

The thought of You delights me.
And so my heart says,

"Behold, my Beloved is mine!
And I am His!"

Your banner over me is Love.

(:

Wonderful, Beautiful, Glorious, Matchless in Everyway.

Desmond and The Happy Ending.

**** Spoiler for 'Enchanted' Alert *****

I watched Enchanted yesterday with some of the youths.

I've gotta say, during the first few animated scenes, I clasped my hands over my face, and thought to myself, "My word. A cartoon. What am I doing here?"

And a few scenes later, this thought struck me. "HEY! I used to like cartoons."

(Anyone rmbs the times I would blog about justice league? and x-men evolution? For crying out loud, my blog template is the stinking batmobile! oh man. And i'm wearing a mickey mouse shirt now! hahaha... )

Thing is, by the end of the movie, I knew for SURE, I'm a chick flick, happy-(predictable)-ending kinda guy. Sure I like my fair share of the emo-drama-days-of-our-lives thing. But there's something about a disney movie that reverts you to a state of 'almost-delusion'.

A state of regained hope in cartoons.

A state where, Princes marry Princesses they've only met for a day.

A state of child-like faith, if you must, in things that this world tries it's hardest to downplay.

(So the ending wasn't all that edifying... as jon and i were saying. but still......)

Happy endings make me happy. (Hence the 'Happy' in the phrase.)

And if anything, I know I have one with God.

:) Thank You for loving me.

Desmond and That Amazing Love.

My hope (must) always stand...
For You hold me in Your hands.

(:

It's desperation that brings me to my knees.
For the Only One that leaves me heart longing and satisfied at the same time.

Master, Be my Savior, be my Shelter, be my God.

You deliver me from my darkest chains, and the things that hold me back in fear.

He works in ways we cannot see, He will make a way for me.

And so I'll wait in brokeness, and in my weakness, for Your strength. Your joy, and Your freedom.

I couldn't love You more than You could ever love me.

Unending, Unfailing, Enduring, Faithful, Fierce and Unwavering...

I cannot think of any more words. But I don't need to.

Your Love Speaks For Itself.

Love that's stronger, Love that covers sin, and takes the weight of the world.

Take my life, for Your glory Lord. Cos I can't do anything more with it. Take over Lord, I've reached the point where my own strength couldn't take me any further.

Jesus, I surrender.

(:

Desmond and the Could Do Better-s.

-photo from esther's blog

"God... gave me... second life..."

I think I could do better, personally. Cos, "God... gave me(desmond)... second life..." too.
And the very least, I could be thankful in all things.

I could do better. I really could.

(: Help me God? Thank You.

Desmond and the Ulcer Hole Puncher Concept.

What a struggle.

I often bite myself when I eat. And thanks to my canine-vampire-honey-starred teeth, I keep giving myself ulcers. Yes. That is 'Ulcer', with the 'S'.

You see, when you bite yourself, your um... 'flesh' inside your mouth is pinched together, so it's kinda like one lump of flesh. One honey-starred teeth will pierce (ARGH!) the top of the lump, and the other honey-starred teeth will pierce the lower part of the lump.

Think folding a piece of paper into two, and then putting it through a hole-puncher. (ARGH!!!!!)When you do unfold the piece of paper, you get 2 holes, from one 'punch'.

Same concept ah, my friend, same concept.

What a struggle.

It's being placed through a hole puncher, and sometimes you're the one doing the punching and sometimes you're not. And there's just so many holes and ulcers and you're starting to think, "could your mouth ever be whole again?" Cos it does seem abit impossible. Afterall, it's yet another ulcer, yet another 2 holes in the wall of your mouth.

For that matter, is it even worth to be made whole again? Cos it seems that the same 2 holes could appear. The same cycle, the same fear of eating, chewing, and enjoying the splendid foods... the same food you've been desiring for days, suddenly turn into things you rather stay away from. Because a wrong bite could lead you to another ulcer. The Fear of the Repeated Ulcer.

What a struggle.

"There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love." - 1 John 4:18

I believe You're my healer.

What a struggle. Yes. But there's a good end, I know. What the enemy intended for evil, You'd turn it around for good. What my own heart lacks the strength to do, there is Your Spirit's help for me. What I struggle with, there is a Perfect Love for which my fears of failures must flee when faced with It.

There is the King of Love, Prince of Peace, Father, Brother, Friend for me.

I believe You're my healer.

Desmond and the Way to a Man's Heart.

People say,"the way to a man's heart, is through his stomach." If that be so, then I've gotta say this -- My heart has had alot of visitors recently.

Too much food recently. But you get the feeling don't you? When you're just in that mood where you wanna try everything. From the Takoyaki Balls that were marinated in water from the dead sea, (salty, lah), to the ramly that seemed rather impressively-made but was actually impressively-lousy after you ate it.

Though I ate none of those. I did eat a zin.ger meal, just cos i wanted cheese-fries.. As I always say, Oh Well.

But no matter... amidst the heart visitations, I've got One Person permanently there.

Even when salty takoyakis, and lousy ramlys come and go. Even when the 'extra' burger crowds out my fries. Even when my heart seems alittle bloated from the crazy non-food visitors. Even when it seems like it could hold no more, and it collapses under it's own weight. When the heart doubts it's own self, and the world...

He's still there. The Permanent, Unchanging One.

And You're all I need. And I can trust in You.
Keeper of my heart. Lover of my soul.
I can trust in You.

Desmond and Worship Camp 07'.

WOW.

And I'll say that backwards.

WOW.

It was so much fun. Staying overnight in church with people from region F. (Region F rocks.) Playing the Bom bom Chi chi Bom Bom Murderer Game, food, jamming with our super basic keyboard skills (Dot and Es!!) Learning our parts... and just like a big sleepover. Late night food, videos, and jamming.

And being challenged in the way I approach God in worship.

WOW.

I realised I am nothing. Not in my singing. Not in my half-past-6 keyboard. Not in my loving, or rather, lame attempts of trying to love people around me. I am so... nothing. I am self-righteouness. I am judgemental even tho I think I'm not. I'm so prideful. And in contrast with that, God is everything. Everything.

It was an awesome worship time, during morning service. Nothing to do with how well I sang, or the worship leader... or the band. But God just... showed up. And that makes all the difference.

More love More power
More of You in my life

I (wanna) worship You
With all of my heart
... my might... my strength!

I can't get enough
I can't get enough
I can't get enough!!

I can't get enough of You. I dun want to be satisfied and complacent.

God, Oh God. Come and shake us to our cores. Move us Lord. Help us to love You more. Help us to be real.

Thank You God. For loving us.
Thank You.

Desmond and the Atmosphere.

I realised getting on the blogging bandwagon ain't all that difficult. It's merely starting with one entry, and if the mood and atmosphere are all right, the next one follows almost as quickly. Like how it's really the atmosphere of the sushi place that ushers the gyoza again and again into your mouth.

Nothing at all to do with how much you like it, or that you're actually just greedy.

Blame it on the Atmosphere, Man.

Still, I know bout the whole Live Earth yada, and yada... So here's something that I saw on my teacher's blog; something found behind the church door.

The atmosphere would give you a whole brownie point toward the LiveEarth cause. But no brownie point from God, that's for sure. (haha, k. kidding. God is so nice! Still... coming from a CHURCH. What an oversight! Sigh.)

But you should lock the door, and switch off the AC, the lights and fans and whatever else after use. Cos, the Atmosphere is really not in good shape. The weather patterns are really changing. What with the crazy weather changes in mere minutes from scorching to rainy. And global warming and blah.

You know what...

Blame it on the Man, Atmosphere.

Desmond and the Attempt at Randomness

I really can't wait for worship camp. Seriously. Haha, just so excited.

AHHHhhhhh...

Anyways, I've been struggling to blog recently. It's a case of Bloggers' Block. Something that has affected me countless times over the course of my entire blogging life. And it's kinda hard to be random, cos, while I admit I am random at times... I think real writing often has a motive to it.

Writing to build up, to tear down, as a release. Maybe I have yet to learn to write to be specifically random (which is most likely an art!)

I wanted to share a poem which we read in lit class once, Why I Write, but. haha I dun want to go down the EMO path. haha... so well. We'll leave it at the "..yet to learn to write to be specifically random (which is most likely an art!)" part! -RHYMES!

Ahhh. God is so good huh? (:

I know the week just started, but I can't wait for the weekends already. haha..

Have a blessed week, reader!

God is good All the time
He put a song of praise
In this heart of mine

God is good All the time
In the darkest night
His light will shine

God is good
He's so good
All the time

Yea You are. All the time. (:

Desmond and the Great Way to End A Work Week,

What a great way to end the work week. I had one of the most satisfying nets tonight...

We had a good worship session, and an honest time of fellowship over the testimonies and the lesson. And I felt really encouraged and edified, spurred on to really make a change.

What a great, great way to end the work week.

I really believe a new day is coming. And I'm so excited. :)

:)))))

Desmond and the Camp-like Week.

It's been an awesome, awesome week. Starting with my sister's wedding, and the fun of being in a suit, and all the wedding stuff...

Then john coming back, and spending time together on Sunday, at borders, where I realised me taking Lit, might be... a challenge. haha. The great mudpie, Ooo. YUM. and then going out with the youths..

Then the week of prayer and fasting came, and every single night was so fun. The sessions, and then the fellowship after that. I's been the closest thing to a church camp I've experienced in a long, long time.

And it was good.

I still rmb when I didn't go for camp one year... think it was my A level year. 05'. Someone actually said something along the lines of, "this would be the last time for the next 2 years that you can go. and I didn't want you to miss it." (YOU WERE RIGHT!)

At that time... I really thot I wouldn't be missing much. Now, I really long for camp. I still don't like camp games (cue readers' GASP!)... but there's just something about really soaking in God's presence the entire day and week that's just so satisfying.

With all the fellowship and fun you have just talking late into the night. Or sneaking into your fren's room and scaring the sleep out of him. (Er hem!)

What a great week! Thanks God. :))) and thank all of you who were a part of it... at the wedding, at service, and prayers every night, at dinners, and suppers.

How awesome was this week man?! (:

You and It.

I think I get the irony. The joke played on us.

The Sniggers of It. It's Sneer, and Sly Smile.
The Sound of It's Snorting as it laughs.
The Sudden turning and it's Secret Seductions.

If anything else, I know, I know.
I know.

That we need You.
I need You.

Come, come, and smite it.
Come, and shatter It's hold.

Son of God, Saviour, Strength to my soul, Sweet Jesus.
Come and Save us.

Save me.

Desmond and the Procrastination.

Procrastination.

Although I would hardly attribute my lack of blogging to procrastination, I've gotta say I've been procrastinating a whole lot recently.

What with wanting to watch HPOOTP, to wanting to start on 24 (Which I've started like 24mins of, and stopped,) to wanting to train for my physical tests, to jumping on the band-wagon of being afraid of the many china-made products... (OOooo. The horror of the chop-sticks. Ewwww.)

Still, while I've been successfully disturbed by disposable chop-sticks now, I still have not watched a minute more of 24; I failed my last physical test; and the closest I've gotten to watching HPOOTP is reading the book.

One may ask why I have time to read the book which takes like a few hours, (Alright, I lie. A few days.) When I can just get to W.Mall and watch the movie in like 3 hours.

That, my friends, is the beauty of procrastination, coupled with the fear of loneliness. You have no idea how many ppl would rather eat with disposable chop-sticks, then take action or be alone.

Still, the alternative to disposable chop-sticks are, well, regular plastic ones, so Some Ppl get the best of both worlds -- Procrastinate, and eat with plastic cutlery, in the presence of their closest friends.

I've got to say, I'm Some Ppl. I've got to put off deciding what to wear for Banquet 07', (going back to my roots...) I ate with metal cutlery, and with the Dear Region F. The F(atal Attract-ors), the crazy bidders...

I didn't bring my camera... It's spoilt. So I'll link you to Esther and Jon's blog... haha

Some of my fav pictures! From both their blogs. haha

(future) Chef, (ex-)Clubber, and (presently) Charcoal.
"We'll meet at the warehouse at 1030 tonight...." Everyone's smiling. :)

I really had fun. :)

Desmond and the New Day.

There's so much I could blog about. Just forming sentences after sentences in my head these past few days, thinking bout stuff... Sad things, real things, happy things, and the like.

Then comes one shower, and it's like I was taken and shook by the Holy Spirit. And you know what, "It's a New Day."

It doesn't matter my failures. It's a New Day.
It doesn't my problems. It's a New Day.
It doesn't matter my shame, and inadequecies. It's a New Day.

It's a Brand New Day, in Jesus. (:
And His mercies are new every morning.

--
It's a new day
Oh, it's a new time
And there's a new way
I'm gonna live my life

All the old has, passed away
And the new has come
Thank God, It's a brand new day

Lookin' back on yesterday
There are things that I regret
But I put the past behind me

And I never will forget
You have covered my mistakes
And my broken dreams

-New Day, Avalon.

Desmond and What God Sees.

I asked God to show me what exactly He saw, when He allowed for me to be put through a trial. When He said, "Ok, I give permission to let Desmond be put through that trial; that situation," what did He see me doing way into the future?

I mean the Bible says that God will not put you through something that is beyond you; His grace is sufficient for you.

In other words, what God saw was probably me coming out victorious, praising Him and His sovereignty in the midst of the trial. And He had that faith in me, to rely on Him and not give in or up. And so He said, "Let it be done." And in His head He thinks at the same time, "Cos My kid will come through victorious. heh heh..."

Doesn't mean that what He saw will come to past. It can. And it would, if we don't give up and keep trusting Him to bring to past what He saw.

But trust me on this, sometimes it's so long and daunting, and we start to give up. I've got situations I'm seemingly stuck in, and it doesn't seem to get better. For one, my right hand is like... has some skin defect or something haha. it's cracking and it's spreading. It's so easy for me to ask, "Why God, why like that," and trust me, I have.

And these situations sometimes are so overwhelming and you're just at the end of your road. You fail and fail and fail a gazillion million times and you think this isn't a way a child of God is supposed to be.

At times like these, ask God what He saw. And perhaps you'd see Him say, "ok, put him/her through that period of trial. Let him have a slip in his health; let her lose her job; let his friends turn against him.

Because I see way ahead, and I see him coming out victorious. I see her praising My name. I see a promotion in the spiritual realm for them. Cause I see him failing, but I see him pressing on and keeping his trust in Me."

So this entry is for those out there who feel they have been abandoned; those who feel so guilty that they have abandoned God; those who have no strength to go on making the same mistakes over and over again...

God saw many possibilities that could arise out of your situation. But He chose to focus on the one where you came through victorious and overcoming, and because of that, He allowed you to be put through it. Choose to see that same one, and press on. As for myself, I'm gonna press on.

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Cor 12:9
"We are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." Rom 8:37

God, glorify Yourself in our lives. Every part of it. Amen.

Desmond and the Waiting Room.

There's just something about sitting at the doctor's waiting for your name/number to be called/beeped, that's just very unnerving.

I think it's the vulnerability one feels cause...

1. he's not sure when his name or number will be called. (The I-Can't-Be-Certain-What's-Next.)
2. he's not sure if he'll hear his name called, especially in that funny accent the nurse has. (The Will-I-Notice-If-It-Does-Come.)
3. he's not really keen on the entire waiting room of 40 patients knowing his name. (The I'm-Kinda-Afraid-What-People-Will-Think.)

Haha, I have so much I wanna say about these 'The-s', but I'm kinda lazy. And yes, I'm Kinda Afraid What People Will Think about my crazy thoughts. Haha...

"Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."
:)

Desmond and the Abcess.

This is a jelly bean.
This is a top-banana-flavoured jelly bean.

Anyways, reduce it by half, and stuff it into the tip of my thumb... and voila. That's how my thumb looks like now.

HAHA... yes. I'm gross. Oh well. I've got quite a graphic imagination. so yea. haha...

Anyways hopefully I get more MC. HAHHA.. like Joash Onyx, The Stone Pokemon.

Give me the desires of my heart, Lord. hahah.

No seriously. :)

In everything God, You remain sovereign. Hallelujah!

Desmond and the People Watching.

I don't know bout you, but I used to people-watch. Still do now sometimes.

The thing about people-watching is that, you see people in their real moments... the moments when they think no one is watching, or they are simply too caught up in their thoughts to care.

You see the screaming kid, and their moms who couldn't care less. You see people who fall asleep suddenly, when the pregnant woman boards the bus/train.

And you also see the people who give up their seats for others.

The people I find myself sneaking glances at are the ones who have a certain, sad smile. Like that song, "the (person) with the broken smile." I'm so intruiged by what's on their minds, as they smile, sadly, at a baby, or out the window.

Are they usually smiley, but are sad that day?
Or are they simply "smiling through the storm?"

I wonder if God people-watches. Actually, He does. He sees all, and knows all. But I wonder what kinda people attracts His attention. I was thinking about this just bout 2 days back.

How timely that the message today hit on one point; us needing to be mindful that God is always watching us.

And I think that's the answer. The people who attract God's attention, are the ones who Fear the LORD. The ones who love Him and respect Him enough, to want to live unto Him and Him alone. The ones who seek to acknowledge Him in every corner and turn of their life.

Father, help me do the same.
To play only to an Audience of One.
Amen. :)

Desmond and the Awesome School Holiday Week.

Like I told my net... This has been an awesome week! EVEN THOUGH my parents were gone... this week felt like a sch holiday week for me. haha..

Recap!
Monday.
Work, then dinner at Elvin's place. Thanks to Esvin. That's Esther tan and Elvin. Nice and warm meal. Then some of them went for kbox. Home for me. haha

Tues.
I took off to work at home. Awesome I tell you. Then a very awesome prayer meeting. (argh vintage red!) Then back to work till bout 4am. It's been so long since I've stayed up... last time in college was cos of Lit Essays. Didn't think I would stay up this late again.

Wed
Boss called me to tell me to work from home on on thurs. HALLELUJAH! Then dinner at elvin's house. Stayed till pretty late, just talking. Then we called johnathan at 12 to sing him a solemn lullaby birthday song. haha.. happy birthday!

Thur
supper with joel, and an awesome day at home, doing work. HAHA.

Fri
Net and my family came back finally!!! I met onyx at net. the stone pokemon. (I choose you!)

God has been so good. To think I'd actually have home-cooked food even tho my mom wasn't around. and to think i'd have so many offs this week. haha, working from home. haha, I dun work the entire day. haha..

A big thanks to all that God sent along my way this week. To bless me in big or small ways. I appreciate the generousity, the company, and you guys. haha. Thanks for being part of an awesome week for me. best in a long time. haha.

i wanna go for camppppp. but still. thanks God! You're awesome!

Desmond and the Sure-fire Ways to Feel Good.

Uncle desmond's here once again, this time to share with you some sure-fire ways to feel good.

#1. Have a good, long bath/shower.

#2. Have a tub ( or more if you must) of Ben and Jerry's in the freezer, just in case.

#3a. Don't compare yourself with others.
b. Or if you really must compare, compare with an elephant. especially with regards to weight issues. you're bound to feel good bout yourself. (:

#4. Get non-see-through cups. If you can't see the water level, you'll never have to bother if the cup is half-full or half-empty.

#5. Watch a Korean Soap. Your life can't be as bad as the protagonist. If your life IS worse, the bright side is, after watching, you'll probably be too mentally exhausted to think bout your problems.

#6. Write a story. After working on it for 1 hour or so, you're kinda all floaty and ya-ya papaya, cos you think you're a novelist.

#7. Sleep. I love this method loads. Can't use it much tho.

#8. Play some praise/worship music.

#9. Hang out in church. And just. enjoy the fellowship of the saints. (:

#10. Know, and Understand, and finally Accept that you're a Son of God. Or Daughter. (Loosely quoted from Bro W during worship meet.)

I'mason I'mason. I'mason. (:
Haha. Ahhh. I rest in the shelter of Your Love.