The One For 2005, for Narnia, and Batman Toys.

Its that time of year again. The time where time seems to stand still-er. Time passes slower. Keating's back up on WMP, to add to that sense of retrospect.

I've just watched The Chronicles of Naria, which I've gotta say, I really love. I've read the books since young, and this particular book is the one I've read countless times over, cos I love it so much more compared to the others in the series.

Reading it since young, dreaming about it, and just getting lost in the fantasy and the magic and the warmth feeling of security, of bravery, of triumph over evil -- to have it all made into a movie, where descriptions in the book actually come to live... ITS JUST AN AWESOME FEELING.

I mean, compared to LOTR, which i really loved too, I tink Narnia LOSES. I wished it was longer, the battle scenes weren't much to compare with those in LOTR. But I love it still, prob more, cos its closer to my life, to my heart, to the deep childhood recesses of my mind.

Its like, this book , The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe, is prob one of the things my childhood revolved around man. Other things include my batman toys... Can't really rmb really anything else from my childhood, as distinctively as these two things.

As I watched the show, one thought came to mind. I'm growing old. Soon I'm gonna be over 20 already.

In this year alone, 2 things that were a very big part of my childhood were brought to life, so to speak. Yes Narnia is one. Another is just something on my heart since young, and now there's an open door. Semi-open.

When something that you've been wishing for, for years LITERALLY, comes and meets you in the present, or near future, that sense of growth hits you really hard.

What has impacted me about this year? I've realised that my wings are spreading abit farther. My heart is rushing beyond the thresholds of what I've been taught since young is safe. I'm doubting alot alot what I've been taught is safe now. I realised I'm growing older. And I realised that God is the only who can truly say, I LOVE YOU.

I wish i had a place like Narnia, to run to. An elder brother like Peter, who wld protect me. A little sister like Lucy, to protect.

I wish to be with Him right now. I miss You SO STINKING MUCH. I MISS YOU I MISS YOU. DAD. BROTHER. FRIEND.

I MISS YOU.